well it has been a long time. There have been many highs and lows on this journey.

for awhile, i thought i was pregnant again (even thought we've been careful).
then i decided to go off the depo shot (because i was getting anxius about having one, and almost passed out/threw up when i did...it was traumatic!)

since i went off the shot, i bled for at least three months straight. worse than the bleeding was the stabbing pain that reminded me of "right after". i'd lie awake at night and wonder what I had done to myself and if it was even worth it all? I do know one thing for sure. Personally, I can not withstand another one. I believe it is each of our own decisions what we do with our bodies, yes. And my body is telling me no more!
It's also a funny thing when you hit 26. at 25 I thought, I could care less if I ever had a baby in my lifetime. At 26, i can FEEL the clock ticking. Not that I have to, but i WANT to.
Which is why I am employed full time and John has gone back to school. We plan to start a family in a few years when we feel our children will have a much more stable, happy, and healthy home to be brought up in.